Alexis Senge Johnson
There’s no good way to say this, so I’m just going to blurt it out. Watching your parents get older and having to tackle tough life issues sucks! There’s a thirty year age difference between my parents and I and I’ve always found that to be a perfect age spread, but I’m probably biased because that’s all I grew up knowing. That age spread now means that my parents are in their sixties and I have to watch them tackle issues much harder then teaching me how to drive or putting up with me dating people they strongly disliked.
When it comes to health matters, there’s nothing I can do but sit still and wait to see what happens. I think I now understand what I put my parents through for all the years when they impatiently sat on their hands while I made bad decision so that their daughter could learn how to be a strong independent gal. It’s hard watching those you love go through things and knowing there isn’t a darn thing you can do that will make everything better.
Seeing my parents struggle through things makes me look back over the years and be so very thankful for the experiences, no matter how off the wall they may have been, that we were able to share. Knowing that they survived my teenage and college years in itself could be considered a miracle by some. It’s not that I was an out of control kid. Just more of a stubbornly independent kid who liked to debate everything. I guess you could say I was working on my skills for the workforce from a very early age.
All that aside, the last thing any kid wants to do is see their parents weakened by something and know that all they can do is stand by their side and hold their hand. It doesn’t matter if you’re three or thirty-three, we all want to be able to make things better when our parents are going through rough times. Suddenly all of the health challenges in my life seem so small and trivial. Each day I wake up hoping for better news from my family and push aside whatever it is that I’m feeling.
I’m not ready to lose anyone else in my life at this point. I know that seems selfish, but I’m saying it anyway. Some times you just have to put it out there into the universe and hope for the best. Then again, you could always do what my mom is doing and find a way to make cancer funny so it seems a little less scary for those surrounding someone with it. Feel free to check out her blog if you’re trying to wrap your head around how that is possible.
