Here I Go Again…

**MATURE TOPIC WARNING**

There’s no hiding that trying to balance all of my jobs with pregnancy and then the first year and a half of motherhood has been a juggling act with my schedule. That being said, this poor blog fell to the wayside and I am happy to finally have it going again. I can’t promise the regularity of the posts, but I can promise that I’ll continue to put my amusing spin on each of the topics that I tackle and that you’ll have plenty of opportunities to laugh at me along the way.  The only way to make a classic return is to keep in my tradition of bringing you topics that are at the top of everyone’s immediate list of concerns, so that being said it’s time that we get a little serious for a moment. 

After talking this over with other gals it’s definitely time to face this head on instead of continuing to sweep it under the rug. With all that’s going on in the world right now, I know that this topic is at the forefront of everyone’s mind and it’s time that I tackle it in a way that I think we can all agree is classically me so I’m just going to rip off the bandaid and say it. Why are “dick pics” a thing? No, seriously gentlemen! This is no laughing matter. Can one of you explain this to my gender so we can all have better clarification on this shocking trend that has been raging on since the invention of camera phones?

While I’m pretty certain guys believe that the response from their intended photographic miracle is one of admiration and astonishment, I can assure you that in 98% of cases it comes with lots of disgust and occasional laughter. I’ve heard from gals that these photos come in a myriad of classifications which include everything from implied nudity, ranking higher on the scale of tasteful and alluring therefore making them somewhat socially acceptable, all the way down to explicitly blunt and therefore trashy. I’ll tell you what, I’ve never had a girl friend of mine say that the defining decision to date, marry or sleep with a guy was based upon one of these photos. As a matter of fact, I’ve overheard plenty of gals laughing over the absurdity of the trend and asking why guys think sending them is a worthy idea.

 Let’s flip the tables for a quick second and think about if a gal tried to reciprocate the “favor” and send an equal photograph back to a guy. Clearly by stating it has to be equal that narrows down the body pretty quickly and also rules out all of the top locations guys generally request a photo of. In the interest of also giving this photo opportunity an equally catch name, let’s evaluate the sensibility of sending a “twat shot.” First off, the name in itself it foolish enough to make you laugh so that definitely doesn’t carry with it a mystery of sexiness. If a guy is out with his crew and receives a sensual photo of most body parts he’s likely to let the group partake in the photo. However, I’d imagine if a guy opened his phone to an indelicate and crudely taken photo of that portion of a gal’s anatomy then he’d shut the message as quickly as he opened it.  

Either way, 2017 is the ten year anniversary for the first iPhone hitting the market and I think it’s time we take a step back and reevaluate this off-putting trend. With the invention of Snapchat and now Instagram’s disappearing message feature, this trend has only continued to grow at a senseless level. It’s time we consider dialing it back a notch and consider keeping it classy instead of trashy on both sides of the gender pool. Leave something to be desired guys and gals and I’m sure you’ll appreciate it in hindsight.