Alexis Senge JohnsonI’ve been attempting to bring back some form of a social life this year and in doing so I’ve had a fair opportunity for some people watching. Humanity is quite an interesting experiment that’s going on around the world each and every day. Now, before you jump all over me for my choice of wording in that statement, take a chill pill and realize that this isn’t going to be one of my deepest posts so feel free to take it with a grain of salt. The following is just my opinion, but I sure would love to know if I’m the only one out there that has this opinion or not.
I have this theory about a sliding scale of assumption that goes along with looks and intelligence when people are eyeing someone else across the bar. When’s the last time you’ve been out with friends and ever heard one of them say, “that guy/gal is intellectually enticing and just I’ve got to go over to strike up a conversation with him” before they stood up and trudged across a crowded bar? Here, let me answer for you…NEVER! People out in a social setting tend to be attracted to each other at first due to looks. However, they then tend to be very disappointed when they return after discovering that the attractive guy/gal across the bar is a complete idiot.
Maybe I’m jaded as someone who men rarely, and by rarely I mean almost never, approach in a social setting. Those who know me tend to say it’s because I seem intimidating when I get all gussied up for a night out. While they are still attempting to explain that to me in a way I can understand, I’ll continue on with my theory. I’ve been left with the opinion that a large percentage of the attractive guys and gals you see out in social settings are outwardly showing their most redeeming quality right off the bat. They’re probably mind-blowingly attractive physically, so don’t expect them to be the next Einstein.
If I glance across the bar and see an extremely attractive gentlemen then I automatically assume there is no way that he’s going to be able to hold up his end of a conversation with me because nine times out of ten that is true. The same goes for some of the gentlemen I know. They tell me stories about the gals they meet, and then eventually date, but they are astonished to their lack of intelligence despite how attractive they are. Looks and intelligence have no correlation! Yes, you could find an attractive person who is equally intelligent. Is that the norm? No, but I will admit I know a few who go against the grain and are both.
The difference between myself and my male friends is that if you can’t uphold a conversation that is mentally stimulating to me then I don’t particularly care how physically attractive you might be. They will complain about a gal’s improper usage of grammar, inability to relate to anything except for reality television and how her materialistic ways are taking up valuable closet and bathroom countertop space but they will continue to keep going around in circles with the gal because she is so physically appealing to them. I just can’t fathom how they do it. I don’t think I have enough patience to deal with that no matter how attractive someone might be.
This theory has led me to a horrible assumption when I see an attractive guy and therefore has led me to refuse to approach them so the illusion of his attractive state isn’t completely ruined for me. Instead, I’ll just admire the fact that he’s hit the genetic lottery from afar as I know the moment he opens his mouth there is a good chance whatever he has to say will be an utter turn off. I know that’s a completely an insane statement, but I’m sticking with it until the sudden resurgence of intellectual and attractive men returns to social settings. Maybe these attractive guys and gals will learn that flexing their brains every once in a while is more important than the focus they put on their bodies if they want to be responsible part of society instead of a black mark on it.
